The Westmonster Daily

My, but they grow so fast! My niece is one year old now. While I’ve stopped showering her with gaudy toys when I figured my brother’s house couldn’t take any more and she’s successfully climbed the first mountain set in her way by life, health, and fate (those bastards) she’s managed to stay the cutest little button the world has ever seen! Seriously, this is not an aunt’s subjective assessment at all! Everybody says so! And yes, I know that everybody always says so, no matter how ugly or egg-shaped the respective baby actually looks. But in this case… well, never mind, I don’t have to prove anything to you! *hmph*

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Anyway, she started being shy with strangers a couple of months ago. While Hubby is a constant source of joy and wonder to her (she’s flirting with my man! Always has!), me, not so much… Since I’ve never really had a lot of contact with a lot of small people she wasn’t usually very thrilled with my carrying her awkwardly around. I guess she sensed my general insecurity with babies and didn’t like the feeling, since she herself hasn’t had the opportunity yet to build much confidence in her own ability to keep herself alive. Whenever I’d pick her up she’d start wailing pretty much right away and fling her little hands toward the next best grown-up nearby. Settling into safer arms, she’d stop crying and smile again.

So that crushed me a little bit.

I knew, rationally, it didn’t have anything to do with sympathy or lack thereof. But it made me question myself anyway. Would I stand a chance with children of my own, if they ever happened? Or would they prefer their more experienced (and obviously more attractive to babies) daddy over me because I’m generally insecure with kids? Rationally, I knew that those questions, too, were nonsense. But emotionally… whole different story!

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Then, one day, shortly after her first birthday, I went over to my brother’s to have dinner with the three of them and take my bro out to the movies. As I walked in the door, my sister-in-law and my niece were home alone, sitting a couple of meters away from the door on the floor. When my niece saw me, she took me in with that quizzical look of hers, then started to grin and gurgle, and actually scuttled toward me! She didn’t stay with me long because she had to go pick up another load of confidence from her mom, but she returned often and seemed generally comfortable in my presence. And it has stayed that way for a couple of weeks now. I can actually make her laugh, and she watches me all the time and grins when I look at her. What A Feeling!!

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Rationally, I know that she probably has overcome her shyness of strangers or maybe I’ve been over there often enough so she knows I’m harmless now, but emotionally, I’m partying inside.

Today, I was invited by a friend from work and her husband to take their recently adopted viper red ’65 Mustang for a spin with them.

Please hold the line while I *faint*.

For those out there who are not familiar with this magnum opus of a car, here’s what it looks like:

(click on image for source)

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For the last two years, whenever I’d been staying at Hubby’s, he’d make me sit on one very uncomfortable wooden folding chair after another in front of the computer. I even had to steal my own cushion out from under the cats purring away sleeping in the old armchair. (more…)

Aaaaah, what a feeling!

I don’t have it often enough.

But when I do have it, there’s this fuzzy gush of yay soaring through me, and I can’t seem to find my head because I’ve used it all up.

Do you know that feeling? It’s “being-proud-of-yourself”.

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Something good happened to me today.

Very spontaneously, I went to a spice exhibition with Hubby and a couple of friends. Yes, spices. Exhibited. When my friend first mentioned it I didn’t really know what to expect, because… spices!? I mean, you could just go to the supermarket and have a good look without paying 10,-€. She was a bit offended when I told her this, I’m afraid. Well, she’ll forgive me. And I have to admit it was a worthwhile experience (okay, “experience” is a bit of an exaggeration but you know what I mean). (more…)

The most recent most bestest thing that happened to me is my niece.

I like babies fine, you see, but I’m not one of those women who go “ooohhh, where’s the ittybittylittleboopiepoooooo?” before going “THEREsheis, yessheis, oooohhh, she’s soooo preeeeetty!”. Nope, that’s not how I roll around babies. I usually don’t roll around babies at all, but definitely not like that! (more…)